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title
Idyllic illusions
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2026-02-05 00:23:51
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Idyllic illusions Idyllic illusions Sunday, April 6, 2025 19 Weeks. What a whirl wind. From hearing that first heartbeat, to approaching every milestone with trepidation and fear- is the fetal pole there? The egg yolk? The amniotic sack? Is there growth? Is the heartbeat continuing?- I can’t believe we made it through. Alhamdolilah. Sometimes I still look at my tiny little belly in awe. I have waited so so so long for this. Now that we are mostly out of the woods, I’ve finally let myself embrace the happiness. And God, the joy. It fills every fiber of my being. It’s like holding your breath and struggling and fighting with no end in sight for so so long- 12 years long - and finally finding warm, golden, joyful, balming relief. Not to say S is magically sober, he’s not though he’s trying. Not to say I’m not stressed anymore about Pakistan. Or there’s no drama. Or that my first trimester was terrific (it wasn’t, it was absolutely dreadful with the non stop nausea, not being ...
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